martes, 11 de febrero de 2014

Hating/Rejecting What I Don't Understand (Day 12)

Yesterday a friend sent me a song and I realized that thoughts related to rejection and hate emerged after making a comparison between 2 friends that like the same band.

Friend "A" is going to be who sent me the song and the other friend that likes the same band is going to be friend "B".

Friend "A" is my ex-girlfriend, who I have allowed myself to define as someone who can't stand alone, because she has always been looking for relationships.

I shared some time with friend "B" during my holidays and I noticed there were some moments in which she turned completely silent and kind of sad. She told me that she has had a bad experience with her ex and she is trying to overcome the break up.

So, that's why I made a connection between friend "A" and "friend "B" + the same band they like. That's why I allowed my mind to make a comparison and end up hating/rejecting the band/song thinking "That's the kind of band pre-programmed systems listen to".

I did not understand anything the lyrics were saying, because my mind was busy with thoughts, therefore I hated/rejected the song/band/new experience.

This helped me realized that sometimes I have lots of judgments towards the things I do not understand, especially when it's a trendy topic/song/joke/phrase, etc. that everybody likes/understands that I have not known yet, therefore I react with rejection/hate, thinking "That's the music/band/joke/phrase/clothes everybody is listening/using/wearing, trying to justify the lack of comprehension with judgments.

It makes me an ignorant to hate something I do not fully understand, expressing myself with opinions that jump into anticipated conclusions.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to react with hate/rejection/judgments/opinions/conclusions/comparisons when being exposed to a new song/band/topic.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed and accepted myself to see/understand/realize what is beyond my hate/rejection/judgments/opinions/conclusions/comparisons when being exposed to a new song/band/topic.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to compare two human beings according to what I think/believe/perceive.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to let my thoughts/beliefs/perceptions to be the directive principles of my current physical existence.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to react with hate/rejection/judgments/opinions/conclusions/comparisons as a justification to remain in my mind system/ego.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to protect/justify my ego/specialness with hate/rejection/judgments/opinions/conclusions/comparisons in order to feel more than a pre-programmed system, but instead of that, I am being one and equal with the system.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself the thought "That's the kind of band pre-programmed systems listen to" to exist within and as myself.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself the lack of comprehension - due to my mind reactions - block the new acquisition of knowledge I can work/analyze in self-honesty.

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to remain in the lack of comprehension instead of allowing myself to see/understand/realize beyond my mind system/ego.

When and as I see myself reacting with hate/judgments/opinions/conclusions/comparisons towards something I am experiencing for the first time, I stop and breathe. I realize that my hate/judgments/opinions/conclusions/comparisons towards something I am experiencing for the first time only make me remain the same within my mind system/ego and it inhibits me from seeing/understanding/realizing new points within which I can apply myself in self-honesty so as to correct myself.

I commit myself to stop the hate/judgments/opinions/conclusions/comparisons towards something I am experiencing for the first time. Thus, I am going to be able to see/understand/realize new points (as I am doing right now) within which I can apply myself in self-honesty in order to correct myself and become I as the physical, the directive principle of my life instead of my mind system/ego.


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