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Mostrando entradas de mayo, 2016

The Process of Stopping Addictions (Day 140)

Earlier, I was listening to a guy on the radio talking about quitting smoking cigarettes and I remembered that it’s been a year without smoking cigarettes. I decided to quit smoking in May last year. You can read my previous posts for more context:

Stop Smoking (Day 84)
Part II: Stop Smoking (Day 86)
Part III: Stop Smoking (Day 89)

This guy said that even though you can quit smoking for 1 or 2 or even 3 years, in one moment you can be back to the habit again and even to smoke the same amount of cigarettes you used to before quitting and that the decision to quit was a day to day decision. I agreed with his perspective.

If you ask me if I have felt a desire to smoke again, I would say yes, there have been moments where I would like to give it a try again. But, in such moments I realize that I am experiencing anxiety. It’s like wanting to have my hands and mouth busy with something. But instead of placing something in my mouth, I’d rather investigate what’s causing that emotion, because if…

Emotional Interpretations (Day 139)

So, here I am continuing with my previous post. Now I - through self forgiveness - will take responsibility for how I interpreted my friend’s words and behavior last week.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that X wanted to manipulate me through his expression by judging him as though he approached me from an energetic experience in order to touch my feelings so I could approve/accept/validate his perspective.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that interpretation is created within oneself when one reacts to the words/behavior that another person is expressing through shifting into one’s mind and connecting the words/behavior to the information and data that is stored there from the past, which creates separation, because in that moment one is not seeing/hearing the other person on an equal level in order to really understand their point.
I forgive myself that I have ac…

Alcohol & Friendship (Day 138)

Last week I was in X’s house with other friends and suddenly he sat in front of me and started sharing his experience as a new dad. I had this perception that he was sharing himself from an energetic experience and that he somehow wanted me to feel the same thing he was feeling.
I remember that it’s not the first time that I have this impression towards him, because we have had more ‘intimate’ moments in the past where we have shared ‘personal issues’ and have been there for each other and things like that.
What he was trying to say to me that day was how he has been digesting the whole process of becoming a father. He said “my girlfriend is the mother of my daughter” and emphasized the ‘mother figure’ by saying that his girlfriend is a mother and that somehow his girlfriend is his mother as well, but from the perspective that he is with a mother and that he understands how important mothers are in children’s lives – well, something like that lol
So, now that I see it, he was trying to…