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Lying For a Good Cause [Day 172]

I have lied to someone in ‘power’ for a good cause. This person found out through immediately following me, they confronted me saying that what I had done was a huge lack of respect and things like that. When I wanted to explain myself, this person was leaving, so I said “But, listen to me. I already listened to you, the idea is to share both perspectives; that’s communication”, so this person listened to me. After listening to me they left saying that they were going to inform another person ‘in charge’.

The reason I lied was to keep some vulnerable kids safe, because they were outside and asked to remain outside due to policy. So, as I have free access to that place, they asked me whether they could come in with me, so I agreed with a condition I made sure they did.

So, here I am ‘transgressing’ someone’s ‘authority’ for a ‘good cause’ that goes beyond policy. I understand the way that I can be judged or accused, but at the same time I know I did something ‘good’. I also understand how being lied feels.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not considered that what I was going to do in order to help others could possibly create a reaction in another person that was in charge.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not used communication in order to explain to the person in charge the whole situation before acting out, because I considered that too much information was not necessary, because the sooner the kids were inside, the better for them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel as someone accused and for a moment feel like sinking into my own emotional reaction of impotence for not being able to explain the situation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have charged myself positively after I talked to the guy ‘in power’, because I judged him as “he is an ignorant who only uses physical force because his intellect is low” vs me that “I am this well-educated person who knows how to protect my point of view politely”.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel happy because I like it when things like this happen where there is a bit of friction between people because they get to know who you are through the words you speak.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have compared my words vs this person in charge’s words and end up thinking that my words were polite and clear vs his emotionally charged reactive words after making things personal, without realizing that the main point is to make things clear for both, instead of only getting the positive/negative consequence of winner/loser.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to charge myself positively after this confrontation by back chatting “They don’t know who they are messing with”.

Self-Corrective & Self-Commitment Statements
When and as I see myself taking for granted that it is not necessary to provide explanations to someone in charge because my cause is more important than their authority, I stop and breathe. I realize that my intention can be good, but I also have to consider the policy in order to avoid future possible problems.

I commit myself to give myself the time to slow down and explain my intentions the best possible, so I can avoid possible conflicts.

When and as I see myself being accused for something ‘wrong’ that I did and they are pointing fingers on me, I stop and breathe. I realize that I have to breathe and slow myself down in order to explain myself effectively without participating in emotional reactions.

I commit myself to stop and breathe when I am being confronted in order to calm myself down and be able to express myself effectively without participation in emotional reactions.

When and as I see myself charging myself positively after I have shared my point of view, I stop and breathe. I realize that I ended up as the ‘winner’ and them as the ‘losers’ because I made a comparison where I judge myself as ‘good’ and them as ‘bad’, which is a polarity equation that inhibits self to see beyond, to see the real purpose of communication, which is a solution that is best for all.

I commit myself to stop comparing my words with the words of others so as to focus more on the message and the clarity of the words instead of ending up only in positive energy. 


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The scenario went as it follows:
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So, I asked myself “Why did that happen?” and in self-honesty I can say that I was not fully aware of what I was doing. I was watching the video, but at the same time having a chat and also concerned about a problem I had. 
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Mr. Nice [Day 174]

I read a conversation between two people where they were talking about me. Person A was sharing a ‘problem’ that had had with me, while Person B was judged by me as Mr. Nice, because they were not supporting Person A, but adding more to the problem. What I mean by ‘adding more’ = no practical support, but continue talking about the same thing, without a solution, but only supporting Person A’s words without questioning them.

What I didn’t like was that for instance Person A was saying stuff like “He said/did this and that, fuck him”, while Person B went “Yes, that’s too bad,he is wrong, I understand what you are going through. Fuck him”, without even knowing me in person, without even talking to me once at least. So, I went within myself “This person thinks they know me? Plus, Person A’s arguments were an interpretation of the events, so Person B was basically reacting to Person A’s reaction. That’s why I say it was not supportive, but reactive.
Why did I judge Person B as ‘Mr. Nice’? …